my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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