It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
don't judge my taste in strippers
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
