Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
