Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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