yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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