im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
