How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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