Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
