Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
