i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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