Me too!
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
