youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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