Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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