Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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