lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
