i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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