the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Blood and glitter go together right?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
