What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens