as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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