I could make wine with my vomit
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
