yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
