So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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