Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
