its not stalking. its research.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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