I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I love having hate sex.
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just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
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I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy