Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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