He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
