Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Randomize
