It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
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I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
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She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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