Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
