their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
