I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
i think my cat just said my name.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
