its not stalking. its research.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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