2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Randomize
