I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Randomize
