I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize