hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize
