wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
