Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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