im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
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