I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
3pm strippers are depressing
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Randomize
