the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I'd cum for enchiladas.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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