We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I think my moral compass just broke
Panties = found
Randomize
