I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
