Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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