Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I'm like, not good at living.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
