16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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