Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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