have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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