i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
