dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I wish there were birth control emojis
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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