Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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